This was a triumph…
I like to play video games. Specifically computer games. I have been playing PC games since “Commander Keen.” I still have most of the CDs to the games I’ve purchased over the years and a few of them would require me to build a custom PC as they are so old that they would not function on current technology. I have walked the halls of castle Wolfenstein, barrel-rolled through the tunnels of Descent, and spent a virtual millennia being the Mayor of SimCities. I have been Gordon Freeman, Commander Sheppard, and the Dark Jedi Revan. I have flown to the far reaches of space in Wing Commander, Freespace, and Tie Fighter. I know what it means to be eaten by a Grue.
Ever since The Boy was born I have found there to be much less time to devote to gaming. It isn’t just a lack of time, but many of the games I enjoy are much too intense for a two year old’s little brain. The last thing I need is for him to witness a Team Fortress 2 match where characters are exploding all over the screen. So no TF2 while The Boy is awake and headphones on while he is asleep.
Since gaming is such a big part of my life it was inevitable that The Boy would pick up on it eventually. It began innocently enough with a casual game called Peggle. I don’t remember the specific order of events, but I ended up using it as a digital pacifier. He was enthralled. He also decided that it should be called “Boom.” Eventually any time I sat down to the computer for any reason, he asked to play “Boom.” I got tired of Peggle pretty quickly, but alas, The Boy would not be deterred. Then, last Christmas, I got Portal 2 by Valve Software.
I have been a huge fan of Valve Software ever since the first Half-Life game. Their games always have a very high level of polish and Portal 2 is no exception. Unlike every other First-Person-Shooter, the Portal gun does not shoot bullets, but instead fires traversable holes. The levels are all puzzle based, with the player trying to find the best way to reach the exit using only portals and a few other objects provided in the levels. There is no gore, no swearing and no death. Well at least not visible, recognizable death. So outside of the normal screen based reservations, I felt it safe for The Boy to experience.
He LOVES it. His favorite part is the big red button in each level. As soon as Chell, the main character, exits the elevator The Boy is already telling me to find the big button.
TB: “We hafta find the big button.”
Me: “Yes. We have to find the button, but we have to get a box first.”
TB: “Yes. Let’s getta box. Where da box go?”
Me: “I don’t know. We have to find it.”
TB: “OOOOHHH yes! We hafta getta box.”
The box is acquired.
TB: “We hafta find the big button.”
The big button appears on screen.
TB: “OOOOOHHH! There’s a big button!”
At the end of every stage there is an elevator that takes you to the next level. Valve uses this, a bit more often than I’d like, to break the action and load the next level. The Boy is not fazed.
TB: “Time to get in a alligator.”
Me: “It’s an elevator not an alligator.”
TB: “It’s a vator not alligator.”
Me: “Right.”
TB: “Vator not alligator.”
Me: “Right. Elevator.”
TB: “It’s loading.”
Me: “Yes still loading.”
TB: “We hafta find a big button!”
Me: “We will find the big button.”
I like sharing it with him. It doesn’t matter that he doesn’t understand the witty dialogue, the subtext or even how the portals work. He enjoys the game on his level, I get to enjoy it on mine and The Mommy gets to enjoy some alone time.
Next up will be to play through the original Portal and teach The Boy Jonathan Coulton’s epic epilogue song. Then we’ll have some cake. No lie.
Daddy On The Fly 
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